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Mockolate

Nov
03



Key Lime Coconut Patties

This was a gift from my sister who found it on one of her many culinary adventures in New York City. I’ve seen them around cyberspace and sometimes in Marshall’s candy aisle. I can’t tell you exactly why I haven’t picked them up myself, mainly it’s because I already had so much candy to deal with that I just didn’t bother. It’s good to know that something will eventually end up in my hands at some point, so I have many thanks to my sister for this review.

I love the packaging, it comes across as very tropical and fun to me. The greens really catch my eye, and the cartoon crocodile with the neon sunglasses. It makes me giggle.

The patties are flat, square, moist cakes of shredded coconut that are neon green the sides have been dipped in chocolate. It has this “stained glass” look with dark sides and a colored inside. it smells of coconut, with it’s fresh, tropical scent. I look at the ingredients and sadly he chocolate here is really mockolate.

The texture is very dense and moist, with the chew being thick and full of the coconut shavings. The flavor is first sweet from the chocolate, then the key limes flavor comes though with a lightly sour zesty note. You then taste the coconut with it’s sweet and nutty flavor, and it really marries the zesty lime and the sweet chocolate. It’s an interesting flavor, as the chocolate and the coconut remain center stage, yet the lime is a nice accent to it which really makes it taste unique.

So overall, they’re not too bad. They were tasty, but I wish it was real chocolate. If you’re a big tropical flavor/coconut fan, I recommend you give consider giving these a shot.

Rating: Might Eat Again

 

Might Eat Again

 


Sep
06



Junior Mints Pastels Box

Ooooo, another limited edition candy based on different colors! There’s been a few like these in the past, most standard candies have color variants for the holidays. Some do color variations for movie tie-ins. It’s been awhile since I’ve seen any, so I was surprised to see these at the local Dollar Tree. Considering that a lot of the Dollar Tree candy tends to be close to or past the expiration date on the package (or at least, from what I’ve noticed) I’m willing to bet these were a spring release earlier this year. I never actually saw them in the store, so I can’t say for sure.

Well, to be honest, there isn’t really anything special about these Pastel Junior Mints. They’re really just are regular Junior Mints but in pastel yellow and blue mockolate shells. That’s it. And I gotta admit, these candies don’t look good in these colors. You know how you have a friend who just looovees wearing that special puke green shirt, but it looks terrible on him? Well, that’s the case of these candies. These new colors make them appear special, but they look awful.

 

Junior Mints Pastels

The cracks in the shell are very visible with the new colors. So the candies end up looking beat up and unkempt. The taste the same as regular Junior Mints do. Strongly of mint with that creamy center, and a hint of chocolate from the mockolate outsides.

So, I can’t quite find a reason to recommend these, They look gross and they taste the same as the regular Junior Mints. Maybe if they were on sale or something? I don’t know. Try these if you dare, or if a color change would be something you’d get a kick out of.

Rating: Inedible

 

Inedible

Links Junior Mint Web page


May
18



Thingamajig Package

Whatchamacallit has a new friend! It was…oh, I forgot the name already. What was it called? That Thingamajig type candy bar?

Thingamajig is a new Limited Edition bar that Hershey’s is producing, I am unsure for how long exactly, as a nice compliment to the Watchamacallit bar. It cleverly sports another placeholder name and is essentially the same sort of candy bar. A few things have been tweaked and switched, but the two are really candy bar siblings as so to speak.

Thingamajig comes in a sassy red wrapper, which is much more eye-catching than Watchamacallit’s beige/yellow color scheme. The wrapper describes it as “Made with chocolate, cocoa crisps and peanut butter”. I admit, I’m suspicious of this, as I know Watchamacallit is made with mockolate. So I can’t help but scrutinize the semantics here. Does “made with” mean the same as “chocolatey”? From a glance at the ingredients, it does. *sigh*

I’ll refrain from comparing the two bars for the sake of brevity, as that territory has been covered by many of the other candy blogs out there. The main difference is that the crispies in Thingamajig are cocoa flavored, and it has a stripe of peanut butter instead of caramel like Whatchamacallit. We all clear here now?

Out of the wrapper, the Thingamajig smells a little like a Reese’s Peanut Butter Cup (RPBC): sweet, peanut buttery with a hint of chocolate.

 

Thingamajig Innards

The flavor is sweet and chocolatey at first, with notes of caramel and cream and that signature mockolate greay texture. Then the peanut butter taste comes in, similar to a Reese’s PBC, but not as intense and fresh. I don’t get any extra chocolate kick from the cocoa crispies, which doesn’t surprise me, as flavored crisped rice is a mild beast to begin with. As I taste this, I am annoyed by the fact that the mockolate coating melts on my fingers as I hold the bar (yes, I don’t like to use the wrapper for that, I like my bars to be free and break off pieces). The cripiss are very fresh and crispy, as I hear them crunch so loudly in my head when I chew them, it’s like there’s a war going on the there.

It was good, better than I expected, but still nothing stellar to knock me off my feet. Use real chocolate next time and it’s very possible I’ll change my mind.

Also check out these reviews at Candyblog.net, Candy Yum Yum!, Cocoa Heaven, A.V. Club, and Limited Edition Foods.

Rating: Might Eat Again

 

Might Eat Again

Links Hershey’s Website


May
06



Wazoo Bars

I found the Wazoo bars totally by accident. I was in the dreaded Wal-Mart, a place I try to be in as infrequently as possible, and was giving the candy shelves by the checkouts a quick once-over. My eyes immediately landed on this freakishly bright packaging on the very bottom shelf. I almost passed over it, as it read as a toy or novelty of some sort at first. I could help but laugh once I had the bars in hand, as they’re so colorful and punchy, but in a way that’s more scary than attractive. Still, they appealed to me somehow, and I took a few home. I could help but wonder what wonderful chemicals I was going to ingest when trying these new flamboyant bars out. Sometimes I gotta take one for the team.

Literally the day after I made my purchase, Cybele reviewed the Blue Razz bar, so I was pleased to know I wasn’t the only one stumbling across these crazy new candy bars. I’ve held back on giving this review in hopes of more information hitting the internet about these bars. Recently a website and commercials started to appear on YouTube.

Ok, on with the description. Wazoo bars are the standard rectangular shape, and aren’t as heavy and they appear. They have, from the illustration on the package, two colored layers of nougat on the inside, covered in a colorful mockolate coating and topped with sprinkles. The website calls the insides “taffy” and the sprinkles “nuggets”, but it seems to be the case of different semantics.

 

Wazoo Blue Razz

Blue Razz: This is the bright blue one, and it looks alien to me. The sprinkles/nuggets on top are like Nerds, but round and not all bumpy. Their colors are pink, yellow and blue and match the coating nicely (what can I say, I’m an artist, I appreciate these thing!). The bar smells so strongly of raspberries, berries, perfume and cotton candy. It’s quite overpowering.

Taking a bite, the bright blue bar has inside that’s bright pink on top and bright deep blue on the bottom. It’s breathtaking, but not in the way I’d consider a food.

The flavor is immediately fruity with flavors of blue raspberry with a taste zest to it. It has a yogurt-like quality to it. The nougat/taffy interior is smooth with a bit of grain. The taste is a nice mix of sweet and tart with a creamy note. If creamsicles came in a raspberry version, it’d taste like this I’d imagine.

The sprinkles have a sharp burst of flavor to them which I was surprised by, since usually sprinkles are usually flavorless.

As awful as it may be to say, I…like it.

 

Wazoo Wild Berriez

Wild Berriez: light purple outside, red, pink, blue yellow sprinkles. I thought the other one smelled strong, this one is so much more pungent. Wow! It smells of grape soda, cotton candy and kool aid. It’s a tasty, 100% artificial smell, like I’d image some icky popular celebrities might smell.

The inside has two layers like the Blue Razz, with a yellow bottom and pink top. Again, the sprinkles are flavored, some tasted of grape and other were just sweet.

The flavor is milder than expected, especially since the smell was so strong. This bar is more sweet and less tart than the Blue Rass. It actually tastes, more…authentic. Can I even use that word describing something with this color?  The first taste is of sweet strawberries, then blueberries (real ones!) and blackberries. Sweet, juicy and floral. The texture is that nice chewy smooth nougat, and even after trying this bar, I’m unsure if I’d call this taffy. 

Ok, so aside from all the visual warnings that these bars give with their fake, garish colors. The flavors are actually pretty fun. I don’t think it’s something I’d buy with any regularity out of fear of turning my insides strange colors. If you’re the kind of person who always enjoyed those oddly-colored yogurts, or Green Eggs and Ham, well, these bars are worth a shot.


Rating: Will Eat Again

 

Will Eat Again

Links Wazoo Website


Mar
27



Necco Malted Milk Eggs Package

One of the many candies unique to Easter are the malted eggs. Many companies make them, each putting their own twist on the candy. I found these in the store and having never seen a variety made by Necco before, I was eager to try them. I wanted to mentally compare them with Robin’s Eggs, Brach’s Malted Eggs, and Jelly Belly’s Malted Eggs, just to name a few.

The Necco eggs come in different festive colors that are a little flat and matte looking. They come in white, pink, blue, purple and some are a mix of any two. They’re speckled with green, purple, and hot pink. Depending on the egg you find, it can either be really attractive or horrifying to look like. Good thing they all taste the same.

The eggs smell sweet and milky with a tang to them. The shell is smooth and cool to the touch, and feels a little greasy. Unlike the Jelly Belly Malted Eggs, the shell on these isn’t hard, instead a white mockolate. Under the mockolate coating there’s a thin layer of milk chocolate, then the very fresh, crispy malt center.

 

Brach's Speckled Malted Eggs

These taste…pretty darned good actually. The flavor is very similar to yogurt raisins; sweet and milky with a tang. The malt has a wonderful full, rich flavor that blends so nicely with the mockolate coating. I don’t taste the chocolate at all. The texture is a delight too, the malt is so crispy and crunchy and the outside contrasts it nicely with a smooth creamy feeling on the tongue.

I was surprised how much I liked these. I think I prefer them over the Jelly Belly ones, especially considering how much cheaper they are.

Rating: Will Buy Again

 

Will Buy Again

Links Necco Website


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