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Not Worth It

Oct
21



Ghost Dots Box

A ghost candy? Seriously, what could be spookier? The idea of little glowing Dots with ghostie faces was just too much to ignore. I swooped up a (giant) bag in Target and eagerly lugged it home.

I should have kept them sealed in their boxes. Opening them up was a huge disappointment.

The Dots are faceless and a seriously lacking in the glowing department. I was also a bit nervous because they smelled strange. This odd, somewhat plastic-y fruity aroma. I decided to let the flavors “shine” for me (haha, get it?) but instead I just got the normal Dots flavors. I guess they think this is new and novel because they all look the same. Which flavor will this ghost be? Ooooo, it’s a mystery! After figuring out what was going on, I didn’t feel any need to finish them.

Although, before I totally gave up on these. I wanted to give them one more chance:

 

Ghost Dots

They needed faces, so I took a sharpie marker to them. That made up for the disappointment….a little.

These are good to hand out for Halloween if you don’t mid your front lawn getting decorated toilet paper later in the evening.

Rating: Not Worth It

 

Not Worth It

Links:
Dots Webpage


Oct
17



Pay Day "Chocolatey" Avalanche

This is going to sound odd coming form someone who hates nuts in their chocolate, but I love Payday. All jokes aside, I am referring to the candy bar. For some reason, taking the nuts out of the chocolate works for me, and that’s what a normal Payday is. So imagine my surprise when I saw this Payday Chocolatey Avalanche bar, I was curious to see how I liked chocolate in my nuts, for once.

Notice the wording “chocolatey” here, we’re obviously not looking (and soon to be eating) the real thing here. Oh, no. We got mockolate here peeps, which is always disappointing. Regardless, this is a Payday, and Payday is more about peanuts than anything else, so I will try and not let it sway my opinion too much. In hand, the bar looks like a normal Payday, just enrobed in the “chocolately” coating. I’m curious as to where the “avalanche” is though. Hrrmm.

My first bite was hard, literally. My teeth had to crack down on this sucker. It was really that hard! I have no choice to assume it’s not fresh, and judging from the code on the back (32Mr3E7f) so that would be…3rd week of 2002? Yikes, I hope not. Anyways, the center of the Payday is what’s rock hard and is giving me the tough time. The rest of the bar is great, and I’m relieved that the peants are still the star here: fresh with a good hit of salt. The chocolatey coating isn’t adding much, it does have an extra little sweetness to it overall, but flavor wise, I get nothing.

Unless you’re like me and are insistent trying every candy on the planet, I’d skip this and keep getting the regular Paydays. You always win with those!

Rating: Not Worth It

 

Not Worth It

Links:
Payday Website

 


Oct
01



Jolly Rancher Fruit Chews Package

I know what you’re thinking: what am I doing reviewing Jolly Rancher Chews when I don’t even like the regular Jolly Ranchers? Well, didn’t I say I’d try anything once? I admit, I was curious to see how the authentic Jolly Rancher flavors translated into a chew. I’m not big on hard candies to begin with, so perhaps the different texture is enough to make me change my mind about the flavors. Only one way to find out!

Immediately out of the box they remind me of Starburst, but with subtle differences. The chews are rectangular as opposed to square and they’re also extremely colorful. They must pump a lot of food coloring into these babies. Popping one into my mouth and I can feel a difference right away. The chew is not as long as satisfying as I’d like. Still, they hold their own nicely and are a great option when you want something chewy with those familiar tart flavors.

 

Jolly Rancher Fruit Chews

Green: Green Apple. I expected this to be terribly fake tasting, but it didn’t end up being so. Yes, since it is Jolly Rancher, it still manages to taste fake to me. But here a majority of it comes off as very authentic. There’s a nice tartness to it that tastes of a fresh granny smith. It still really gets the saliva going.

Pink: Watermelon. The flavor is not as artificial as the actual hard candy. It’s much lighter with fresher notes of melon. It still has that strange zestiness to it though.

Red Cherry, yet it doesn’t taste of cherry. It’s very tart, sort of woodsy with deep flavors that strike me more like plums. It’s more of a tart generic “red” flavor. It has a bitter finish reminiscent of medicine.

Blue: Blue Raspberry. Wow, this tastes very fake, even more than the original candy. It’s very fruity, floral with a bubble gum essence to it. Maybe that’s where the fake intense sweetness comes from? I also taste a little melon in there too. Odd how it’s overall effect is blue raspberry. Very strange.

I was hoping that these chews would change my mind about Jolly Ranchers, but they didn’t. I think I have learned my lesson and will move on to better things.

Rating: Not Worth It

 

Not Worth It

Links:
Jolly Rancher Chews Website

 


Sep
30



Cadbury Dairy Milk Snack

The the idea of the Cabury Filled Dessert Bar excited me from the beginning. It’s as if a box of assorted chocolate bonbons were smooshed together and made into a conveniently filled chocolate bar. Genius! Why wasn’t something like this made sooner? Really!

Cadbury was clever about labeling the flavors in the bar. On the back of the wrapper there’s a key to all the different flavors, so there’s no surprises to what you’re getting when you break off a section. They were very creative with the shapes too; using pineapples, hearts, triangles, etc. to decorate the bar. I wish I took a picture of it before I ate it. Sometimes I’m too excited to do that though, and this was one of those times. I promise to be better about it in the future.

My first taste was underwhelming because the chocolate doesn’t taste up to the normal Cadbury standard. It’s very sweet, but I am missing the cocoa and the dairy flavors that are usually so consistent with their chocolate. Deciding to not let that taint the rest of my experience, I pressed on…

Orange: was so untociceable, really, I can’t remember tasting much!

Coconut Ice: I didn’t taste coconut per se, but there was a coconut essence to it. It was as if someone whispered “coconut” to me from across the room and I thought I heard something…maybe” kind of a way.

Turkish Delight: This one was awful. It tasted like I was eating a bar of soap.

Pineapple: thebest of the bunch, yet that doesn’t say much, the brightly yellow colored goo on the inside didn’t taste of pineapple. It did have the zestiness after it that you expect with pineapple, but the flavor was more “mystery articicial fruit” than pineapple. It was tasty at least, which is more than what the others can say for themselves.

Strawberry: Extremely bright pink in color. The flavor actually has a fruity essence to it, but it doesn’t really taste of strawberry. It just tastes “pink” which for me is a generic berry flavor that’s hard to lay your finger on.

Caramel: Sadly, there’s not much caramel flavor to be found. Actually, it’s totally missing. Oh, Caramello, you’d be so ashamed!

This was such a disappointment. Granted, I had really hyped it up in my mind, but considering how Cadbury usually is pretty solid in terms of good chocolate delivery. I can’t help but feel this bar leaves a lot to be desired still. I’m see this as a starting point for some good improvement!

Rating: Not Worth It

 

Not Worth It

Links:
Cadbury Dair Milk Snack Webpage

 


Sep
26



Honey Moon Swiss Chocolate Bar: Package

As I’m always on the prowl for new flavors and types of candy, so I get pretty thrilled when I find something new to try. I found this Schmerling’s Swss Chocolate bar amongst other Kosher chocolate in the import section on one of my local grocery stores. What drew me to it immediately was the “Honey Moon” name, as it’s flavored with honey and nougat bits. Neither of which I’ve had in a chocolate bar before.

Unwrapped, the bar is a nice medium brown color like a respectable milk chocolate and the creaminess of the color shows a high milk content. The flecks of the nougat are visible all though-ought the bar, giving it a pretty spotted look. The break is surprisingly hard for a milk chocolate, which are normally soft and almost fudgy.

 

Honey Moon Swiss Chocolate Bar

The flavor is surprising to say the least. There’s no chocolate or dairy flavors at all. Instead you mainly taste the nougat, which has an almond/hazelnut flavor with just a touch of honey to it. The chocolate manifests itself as a throat burning sweetness that appeares in the finish and leaves a long aftertaste in the mouth. The texture is a little crunchy because of the nougat bits, which feel like nuts as they’re a little crispy but have a “meaty” texture to them. The chocolate’s texture is unremarkable; not grainy but not smooth either.

Overall, I was disappointed because this wasn’t as “honey nougat-y chocolaty” tasting as I’d hoped. If I move past that it’s ok tasting and delivers a mean sugar burn, so if I was even in need of something intense, this could do the trick.

Rating: Not Worth It

 

Not Worth It


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